Drive-Thru or Walk-In?

This is one of our modern day conundrums, like yesteryear’s “paper or plastic.” Everywhere, whether you’re going out for burgers, donuts, or perhaps just to make a bank deposit, you have to make the choice.

My wife and I discovered a couple years ago that, even if we were in the mood to enjoy our Checkerburgers outside at one of the tables, we would get our victuals a lot quicker via the drive-thru than if we parked and lined up at the front window.

The bank? We haven’t quite figured that one out, yet. Like this morning I drove down to Bank America on 52 in Hudson. Because I was making what I believed was a “simple” transaction, and since I know the lines inside were tied up by old-timers who went to the bank just to converse with the tellers, I figured I’d try the drive-thru.

It seemed like the right choice, because the third slot from the window was empty allowing me to pull right in. Hastily, I placed my three checks plus the deposit slip in a canister and sent it off. I wanted to get some cash back, $50, so to facilitate matters, I had remembered to sign the slip in the appropriate spot. Quick in and out, I’m thinking.

I had a good view of the two women who were working the drive-thru. One of them pulled my canister out of the shoot and set it down while she completed the transaction she was working on. My turn. I watched as she ran the checks thru the little machine the tellers have. I guess it’s some kind of scanner. Something wasn’t going right - she seemed perplexed. She went thru the procedure again, with no more success. Several minutes went by, then she gave up and carried my checks, etc. to the other girl.

I was familiar with this girl. She has hair down past her ass. The last time she had served me inside, she had greeted me with a “Congratulations, Mr. Toscano, you’ve been selected to…” She was trying to make it sound like I had won something when, in truth, she was trying to sell me something. “No, thanks,” I replied.

Meanwhile, a lady in an SUV who had been sitting behind me, saw an open slot. So, she backed up and slid into it. Needless to say, a couple minutes later, she was finished and on her way. I pressed the “Call” button. “Yes? Can I help you?” girl number one responded. “Yeah,” I said. “How come she’s gone and I’m still sitting here?” “Well, sir, she may have had a simpler transaction that was easy to complete.” “I’m depositing three checks and getting $50 back. I thought that was pretty simple.” “Well, there was a problem with your checks. They have to be scanned individually…” Crapola. I’ve been going to that bank for years. It takes about 2 seconds to scan on check.

Other customers are coming and going. I’m still waiting. Finally, Ms. Long Hair ships the canister back and says, “Thank you, sir, have a great day.” “Yeah, sure,” I bark back. “It’s gonna be wonderful.” “When you want cash back, sir, we have to scan the checks individually…” I got the message: the delay was my fault because I brought them three checks and asked for $50 back. No chance that the fault was theirs. Next time, I’ll see if I can deposit the checks at Checkers.