Friday, March 27, 2009

Sorry Reese, I Just Didn’t Get It

For the longest time, I wondered why Reese Witherspoon seemed to be distancing herself from what, for me, was one of my favorite movies, Freeway (1996). Sure, she played a somewhat earthy Vanessa Lutz, but she did it sooo well. Really, oscar performance in Walk The Line aside, I believe this was some of her best work.

Then, today, I saw the sprightly mother-of-two bound onto the stage of the Ellen show, looking much more like her Legally Blonde character Elle Woods and I finally got it – this is who Reese Witherspoon wants to be. And that is definitely her prerogative. As a responsible mother, America’s Sweetheart has the right to deny the existence of Freeway, at least until her little ones are old enough to understand.

For my part, when asked, from now on, I’ll list, as my favorite Reese Witherspoon movies, Legally Blonde and Sweet Home Alabama. Freeway? Nope, sorry, never heard of it. In fact, if you come across a copy of it, Reese and I would consider it a personal favor if you would just throw it into the fire. Thanks.

Wednesday, March 25, 2009

Are You Tweeting? Are You Tweeting?

Dorme vous? Dorme vous?

I couldn't resist that.

I’ve been tweeting. Or twittering. Whatever you want to call it. Don’t ask me why. Guess I’m just curious.

There are some serious tweeters out there. I’ve run into guys and gals with tens of thousands of “followers.” That’s code for twitter connections. At any given moment I can go to my twitter home page and find scores of messages.

Wikipedia describes twitter as “a social networking and micro-blogging service that enables its users to send and read other users' updates known as tweets. Tweets are text-based posts of up to 140 bytes in length. Updates are displayed on the user's profile page and delivered to other users who have signed up to receive them. Senders can restrict delivery to those in their circle of friends (delivery to everyone being the default).”

Is there money in tweeting? I wish. Still, there are scores of self-promotion gurus who are trying to drum up business for their investment, real estate, self-help, etc. websites. Some of them link to souped up web pages that present 90 minute infomercials. I ain’t kidding. I’ve accepted invitations to follow some of them, others, the most nauseating, I’ve rejected. I, along with 569,000 others, am even following Barack Obama though he hasn’t tweeted since he’s been in office. Secret Service probably cracked down on that - national security.

Anyway, right now, I’m following 76 tweeters, 59 are following me. When some of those followers find out, and I’m sure they will, that I’m not following them, I’m sure they’ll delete me from their networks. Tit for tat.

My tweets? Just spur of the moment flashes I come up with when I think I ought to post something. Will it drive tweeters to my websites? I doubt it, unless someone thinks they might be able to trap me into signing up for one of their site-improvement scams. Yeah, right, I’ll sign up for that. To tell you the truth, I don’t have much time for tweeting. I’m too busy with other stuff.

Monday, March 23, 2009

No Life On Mars

Based on the British series of the same name, ABC’s Life On Mars, with its star-studded cast that includes Jason O’Mara, Harvey Keitel, Michael Imperioli and Gretchen Mol was canceled after just one season. There will probably be DVDs available for Season One, but no posters. Though I enjoyed this show, I’m not that upset about the cancellation, mainly because I’ve been promised a thrilling conclusion.

An author who lengthened his novel by filling it with incidental events experienced by the protagonist probably wouldn’t make anybody’s bestsellers list. Yet, TV producers think that viewers will hang on through years of episodic unraveling in hopes of arriving at some kind of conclusion. These shows are not for me.

I mean, yeah, way back in a distant day, I managed to get all wrapped up in The Fugitive. Back then, I think everybody was. But that was enough for me. Ever since, every time I run into a show that denies me a weekly resolution, I say to myself “Oh, no, not another one of these.”

So, one season of wondering “What the hell’s going on with Sam Tyler?” is about all I can stand. If the final episode doesn't give me closure, maybe I can watch the British episodes online.

Wednesday, March 18, 2009

AIG Pie-In-The-Face Bonuses

I certainly would never advocate violence toward the 96 individuals who divvied up that $165 million bonus pot; still, they are thieves and as thieves they should have reason to look over their shoulders now and for the foreseeable future. Therefore, I’m suggesting a Pie-In-The-Face-Of-AIG-Bonus-Recipients campaign. I’ll keep score right here and post pictures if you supply them.

Wednesday, March 11, 2009

American Idol According to the Script

If we can agree that the judges’ opinions have an effect on voting, and that the producers of the show have preferences regarding contestants that are more about ratings than vocal talent, then we can face the fact that to a large extent these shows are scripted.

Because of this, it was necessary last night for all four judges to heap praise upon Adam Lambert who took screeching off-key to a new level. Their reaction to his performance for anyone who isn’t tone death had to be mind boggling. Same goes for that big ol’ country bumpkin Michael Sarver. Though he displayed more singing ability than Lambert, it was mediocre karaoke at best. But, not for the judges. They also sung his praises. Guess they don’t want to waste all that down home footage.

On the other hand, they were not impressed by Megan Joy whose voice has a quality professionals would die for. Matt Giraud, Kris Allen, Danny Gokey, Scott, Allison, Alexis, Lil and Jasmine all deserve to stay. Jorge and Anoop should pack their bags. You heard it here, first.

Tuesday, March 10, 2009

Hear, Now, The News

Realistically speaking, there’s only one real story out there, nowadays – we’re in a “deep recession,” on the brink of a “great depression,” goin’ broke, hittin’ the skids. Our economy’s in the toilet, spiraling downward like this morning’s excrement. But all that’s a little depressing, so, to divert our attention, the media’s been focusing on other stories like the chimp attack, the whacked-out Casey Anthony, the equally whacked-out Octo-mom, the missing 5-year- old, Haleigh Cummings, and, most recently, Chris Brown and Rihanna. Oh, this just in: I just learned this morning that Chris and Rihanna are getting ready to record… together! That’s big! Bigger even than the engagement of Robert Cummings, father of the missing Haleigh, to his 17-year-old girlfriend, Misty Croslin, which was yesterday’s hot topic. Meanwhile, my 700 shares of GE are worth less than the 2003 Hyundai I’ve been driving around. I won’t be trading up anytime soon.