Lone Star: Channeling George Clooney

Josh Lucas

 This is weird: I decided to give the new Fox series Lone Star a shot, mainly because I didn’t see anything too appealing up against it, and recorded it along with the NBC show Chase. Well, we, my wife and I, weren’t far into the first episode of Lone Star when an actor pops up who strikes me as familiar. “Hey,” I said, “isn’t that the guy who played Reese Witherspoon’s husband in Sweet Home Alabama?” My wife said she didn’t know. Well, from another angle, it was obvious that this was not Josh Lucas, the guy I had been thinking of.

Cole Hauser

 Next, we watch Chase. As soon as character Jimmy Godfrey appears on the screen, I say to my wife, “Well, I’ll be damned! There he is. That’s the guy who played her husband. Can you beat that? I thought he was in the other show and, now, he turns up in this one.” “That’s weird!” she agreed. Of course, as it turns out actor Cole Hauser was not the guy who played Reese’s husband, either. But, like I said, it’s weird. In my defense, Looking at their pictures, it looks like their noses are similar.


Putting aside indications of my diminished mental capacity, we gave the two shows mixed reviews. Before it was cancelled we had already made up our minds not to watch Lone Star again. It just wasn’t offering the kind of story I could get into on a long term basis. The only thing mildly interesting, aside the obligatory hot girlfriend, was James Wolk’s Clooneyesque facial contrivances. What the hell, if you have aspirations of being a heartthrob, who better to mimic.

It’s sort of ironic that the show is being replaced by Season 3 of Lie To Me, another show that me and my honey removed from our potential watch-list after seeing the first episode. Go figure.

Winter Olympics: Will NBC Cash In On Tragedy

I did a lot of sledding when I was a kid. When it snowed, the Town of Dover used to close off Segur Street, a fairly steep hill on the north side, thereby turning an otherwise boring snow day off into one packed with thrills and chills. In the fall, there was a grassy hill in Locust Hill Cemetery that we used to slide down while sitting or laying on sheets of cardboard. That’s about a close as I ever got to the insanity known as lugeing.

The idea of Georgian luge competitor Nodar Kumaritashvili flying down the track on his back in such an extremely vulnerable position at 90 miles an hour boggles the mind. I mean, if you have an urge to compete, don’t you think you could find a safer outlet? Still, it’s a recognized Olympic sport and, apparently, it’s gaining in popularity, at least with the athletes.

Now, in the aftermath of the tragic death of Nodar, it appears lugeing will become more popular with tv viewers, too. NBC keeps hammering home the inherent dangers associated with the Olympic track in hopes, I suspect, to make viewers tune in to the luge competition just to see if anyone else crashes.

Australian luger Hannah Campbell-Pegg compared fellow luge competitors to crash-test dummies. ''I think they are pushing it a little too much,'' she said referring to the fast and dangerous Olympic track.”

Let’s see how much airtime goes toward the luge, now. Will people be drawn to it with the same morbid curiosity that bolsters auto racing?

Speaking of auto racing, I’m more interested in watching Danica Patrick at Daytona, today, than anything going on in Vancouver.

Anyway, as I twittered yesterday, if you want to make the Olympics more popular, eliminate opening ceremonies that are geared toward those who would rather go to a Broadway show than a ballgame.

As for Nodar Kumaritashvili, his death is a tragic loss for his teammates, friends, family and for all those who foresaw the Olympics as a wonderful event.

The Listener - Mental - Medium

It's summer. There's not much to watch on TV as regards dramas. So, I'm trying to like The Listener.

Granted, I've only seen two episodes, but here's my problem. It's hard to think "drama" when the show's main character, Toby Logan played by Craig Olejnik, bears a striking resemblence to Dana Carvey, one of my favorite funnymen. Just to be sure, I ran this notion past my wife, and she too had observed the similarities.

Still, aside from that, I'm liking the show so far. I like what's going on between Toby and his ex-girlfriend Dr. Olivia Fawcett, and Detective Charlene Marks portrayed by ex-model Lisa Marcos. And there's something likeable about his partner/buddy/regular guy Oz Bey.

Admittedly, the EMT thing doesn't thrill me, but, for now, during these stark days of summer TV viewing, I'll put up with it.

While we're talking about shows meant to rival The Mentalist, we should talk about the FOX offering Mental. This show might be of interest to students of Psych 101, but probably not to the rest of us who have learned long ago that psychotic people are not very much fun. Personally, I've had my fill of them.

Then there's Medium starring Patricia Arquette. A favorite of my wife and me, it was dumped by NBC and immediately picked up by CBS for the fall season. Thank God. I thought this last season had some of the best episodes of the entire 5 year run. Reportedly, NBC thought the show was "aging, as we were getting younger." Yeah, sure, as can be verified by the torturous Law and Order trilogy. There's a good reason why NBC is last in the ratings - it's being run by a bunch of idiots. And here I am holding 700 shares of parent company GE. Talk about idiots.

Fantasy Traffic With Alicia Roberts

Alicia: Let’s cut to Copter Cal for a live report from Pasco County. How are things moving this morning, Cal?
Cal: (whup-whup-whup-whup-whup-whup-whup-whup-whup-whup-whup) Good morning, Alicia. Right now we’re looking down at Massachusetts, and it looks like the cars are trying to navigate through an ocean of goo.
Alicia: Things are moving pretty slowly, then.
Cal: (whup-whup-whup-whup-whup-whup-whup-whup-whup-whup-whup) Barely moving, Alicia, at least the eastbound lane. Westbound is moving better.
Alicia: What exactly is causing the slowdown, Cal? Has there been an accident?
Cal: (whup-whup-whup-whup-whup-whup-whup-whup-whup-whup-whup) No, Alicia, no accidents. The problem is a common one. There’s a slow moving car, a white minivan/SUV cross, in the left lane and its driver seems unwilling to pass the car in the right lane that it’s coupled with. Their theme song, if they had a chance to choose one, would undoubtedly be “I Love A Parade” because cars are lined up for three miles behind them and, I don't know if you can hear it, there is a lot of frustrated horn honking going on.
Alicia: You know, Cal, I had an uncle who was blind in his right eye and he used to say that he preferred driving in the left lane. Maybe the driver of the minivan is blind in one eye.
Cal: (whup-whup-whup-whup-whup-whup-whup-whup-whup-whup-whup) I doubt that, Alicia. More likely, she intends to make a left turn onto Little Road three miles up the road and is in the left lane preparing for that.
Alicia: So what’s your recommendation, Cal? An alternate route?
Cal: (whup-whup-whup-whup-whup-whup-whup-whup-whup-whup-whup) No, seeing as it’s December, you might as well just fall in line and be patient. Copter Cal’s Equalization Theory applies.
Alicia: And that theory is?
Cal: (whup-whup-whup-whup-whup-whup-whup-whup-whup-whup-whup) The theory states that after December 1st, because of the proliferation of discourteous, self-absorbed drivers, otherwise known as Snowbirds, it doesn’t matter what route you take or what lane you’re in – you’re always going to run about ten minutes late.
Alicia: So, the answer is “Leave early and give yourself plenty of time.”
Cal: (whup-whup-whup-whup-whup-whup-whup-whup-whup-whup-whup) Yes, Alicia, that’s about it. Okay, now, we’ve run into a similar situation heading north on Little Road in Hudson. Now, the left lane is occupied by a silver SUV, plate number I10CB… I can’t make out that last letter. It looks like a J or a T. She also has that parade thing going on.
Alicia: Does it look like she’s preparing to make a left hand turn?
Cal: (whup-whup-whup-whup-whup-whup-whup-whup-whup-whup-whup) No, Alicia, she’s busy talking on her cell phone. This is a common problem that we all encounter every day. People who talk on their cell phones while driving typically abandon their driving personas and slip into one of their other personas.
Alicia: That’s an interesting way to describe it, Cal.
Cal: (whup-whup-whup-whup-whup-whup-whup-whup-whup-whup-whup) Some sociologists postulate that each of us are composites of various roles we play. For example, in one role, I’m a father, in another role, I’m a husband, in another, I’m Copter Cal the weather guy. For each role, I project a different persona. Similarly, people used to slip into their driving personas when they slid in behind the wheels of their vehicles. Now, however, confusion can develop depending on who they are talking to on their phones. Say, for instance, this young lady is talking to her boss. She, by necessity, has had to abandon her driving persona in favor of her professional business persona.
Alicia: Which means?
Cal: (whup-whup-whup-whup-whup-whup-whup-whup-whup-whup-whup) T.A.S.U., Alicia. Drive at your own friggin’ risk – Traffic’s All Screwed Up!
Alicia: Thanks, Cal. Well, you heard him folks, there's nothing unusual to report at this hour. Stay tuned for the next update.

Gettin’ Down To Bidness with Katie Couric’s Hair

When it comes to Katie Couric’s appearance, I usually ignore my wife’s comments – they seem too catty, like “Oh, she’s had her eyes done,” or “Botox!” But, I had to take note the other day when she exclaimed, “Oh, so cute!”

She, of course, was referring to Katie’s new hairdo (photo: before left, after right). I glanced at the screen and had to concur that Katie was looking exceptionally cute with the new short arrangement of her locks. Here are some other thoughts on this critical matter.

Greg Pollowitz of National Review online commented, “Kind of makes her look like Gov. Palin, no?”

Amy Diluna, NY Daily News fashion editor, remarked, “The coif, a boyish pixie cut that channeled some of Hillary Clinton's bad 'do days…”

TopSocialite.com similarly noted, “she looked like a mix between Katie Holmes and Hilary Clinton.”

Bricks and Stones referred to it as “A new unflattering haircut.”

Samantha Chang of TheImproper.com called the do “an unflattering pixie haircut.”

Now, I know a lot of people don’t think Katie Couric’s hair is a critical issue at this particular point in history. I wonder what they’d say if Brian Williams shaved his head.