Criminal Intent: Goren and Eames Return To Say Good-Bye

Season 10 of USA network's Law and Order: Criminal Intent began with a bang, or, actually, with a couple bangs as, once again, murder was on the menu.

First to meet the reaper was call girl Sara Bell who met her bad end shortly after an appearance at a party at fashion designer Nyle Brite's pad winds up wrapped up in a rug in her apartment with two bullet holes in her. Witnesses noted that the site of Ms Bell so upset the drugged up party animal Brite (Jay Mohr) that he ended the party on the spot and ordered everyone out of his house. This morsel instantly placed him on Goren and Eames's list of suspects but a little due diligence soon revealed that the reason Brite was upset was the fact that Sara Bell was his daughter. He admitted to clocking her up aside the head but swore he didn't kill her. Brite was removed from suspicion when he, too, was found dead.

I have to admit, the resurrection of CI caught me by surprise. A big fan of the Goren and Eames version, I thought the series had breathed its last. Then, I caught a promo and a front page preview on the Sunday paper's TV insert and my pulse started to race. But, alas, I soon learned that this is being billed as "The Final Season," and I couldn't help wondering "Why bring it back only to kill it again."

TV execs seldom make sense to me.

And the Emmy for Worst New Show Goes To…

Covert Affairs. This series from the USA Network has earned our highest grade for unwatchability – a perfect 10. Forget about the farfetched premise and plotlines with more holes than a spaghetti sieve, what brings this series down is star Piper Perabo or, more specifically, her lips. Show after show, shot after shot, pictures Ms. Perabo with the oddest contrivance of attitude to ever effect post-Angelina lips. At times, it looks like she has lost all control and feel of her lips as if she’s been shot up with Novocain. Or maybe they’re frozen. No matter, I can almost hear the director demanding from her “more poutiness, more poutiness.” Whenever the camera’s on her the focus is on her lips. Sorry, I tried to watch a couple episodes but I could not get past the lips, the lips, the lips. God, is it ever distracting. Surrounded by competent actors like Kari Matchett (“24” and “ER” among her credits) and Peter Gallagher (“While You Were Sleeping”), Perabo hijacked the show with her lips. After that, the show never had a chance.