House Hunters – Home Sweet Home

Staying married for almost 44 years involves more than a little compromising. That’s why I can be found some evenings watching along with my sweeter-half one of her favorite TV shows, House Hunters.

For the uninitiated, House Hunters follows the real-life exploits of a couple or family as they try to buy a house. The show invariably starts off in the buyer's present digs pointing out the dwelling's shortcomings and elaborating on what they are looking for in their new place. Then, a realtor shows them three different places from which they ultimately choose one. That’s the show in a nutshell.

Along the way to hovel happiness, we get to see firsthand the insights and observations of the prospective buyers. Some want yards for their dogs. As if the dogs really care about the place where they lift their legs or squat! Others desire finished basements for their musical pursuits. Recently, a man complained about the narrowness of a bathroom. I couldn’t help wondering aloud, “What’s he want to do in there, practice ballroom dancing?”

And kitchens are very important to some women, and men. Many, nowadays, are disappointed if the countertops are not made of granite and their appliances are not stainless steal. I don’t know what bugs me more, their whining, or their need to keep up with the latest trends. I’ve sold a couple houses and I can tell you that if prospective buyers tried to negotiate the asking price down by citing some perceived shortcoming, I’d simply state “Then this isn’t the house for you. Go look someplace else.”

Another of my wife’s favorite shows involves people who have sold their houses returning sometime later to see what the new owners have done to it. The drama involves the host sharing reactions of the old owners with the new owners. I rate this show a strong Who-the-Hell-Gives-A-Shit. It’s not your house any more! These people can do whatever the hell they want with it.

What I don’t go through for my lady.